Todays Grand Prix had one main event, which was Vettel sliding out of the race with a puncture. Of course my reaction to this was dignified and sympathetic… however I display dignity and sympathy by jumping up and down and busting out my ‘victory dance’… Just so you know. Hamilton of course took the race, a fact that many people are taking to mean Hamilton is better than Vettel though I will remain as unbiased as I can and say for the record that considering the fact Seb was already pulling away slightly when he came-a-cropper I think this would have been another runaway victory for Vettel. However it has given Hamilton the opportunity to ‘CHEER THE FRICK UP!’ which is something he’s been needing whilst he moped around the garages, lamenting the loss of his pussycat.

A seldom seen image

So now the focus is on 2nd place in the championship. With one race to go it will definitely be either Button, Alonso or at a long shot Webber. Considering my Fernando-love and the fact I’m really loving Button these days, it doesn’t make too much of a difference to me… I’d love to see either of them finish 2nd. Mark Webber would need to win in Brazil and Jenson get no more than 1 point if he were to take 2nd, so I’m officially ruling him out. My gut feeling is that it will be Button but my heart beats Fernando! As long as Jenson finishes either in front of Alonso or no more than 2 places behind he should find this an easy one.

It has been refreshing to see a happy Hamilton this race weekend though. I particularly enjoyed the fact he’s a total Mummy’s boy getting her in his pictures for her birthday… awww! Though I did roll my eyes at his declaration in Quali build up yesterday that he ‘doesnt want to be single for long’ seemingly forgetting that this is Formula 1 and not Match.com!! I was also slightly perplexed by the love-in between Hammy and Nando this weekend. Hamilton was pleasantly surprised to hear that Alonso had rated him as the “only driver capable of winning races in a car which is not the best.” He repaid the compliment in the post race press conference by referring to Fernando as “One of the best drivers in the World” which just gave me the image of two lovestruck teenagers crooning into their phones ‘No, YOU hang up first!’

Overall a pretty boring race other than Vettels first lap incident and Pastor Maldonado seemingly going colour blind and ignoring all the blue flags. In a fortnight however, we have Brazil, which will decide the rest of the top 4. Bring it on!

Till next time.

Love from Auntie Lynsey K

Dear BBC F1 Producer people,

Karun Chandhok filled in for EJ brilliantly today. I found him both interesting and entertaining. Please consider giving him a full time job if he doesn’t manage to get a drive next year. He will otherwise be a wasted resource

Love and Cuddles, Lynsey K

Seriously though, I’ve always had a soft spot for Karun so it was great to see him step up to a presenting role. I think that with all due respect to DC, it is great to hear from a driver who has just stepped out of the car rather than the usual “When I was driving in 2002…” which is often not entirely relevant to the current set up of the cars! I think the ideal situation next year though would be to have him in a car, preferably a good one.

On the subject of drivers I want to see more of, Ricciardo gave us a great tour of the track in the pre-race build up. He is another driver I really can’t get enough of and I’d like to see him do better in 2012, particularly after his qualifying session was a complete no-go as he failed to leave the pits for the first session at all. He deserves more coverage… even if it’s only because he has a very interesting and mesmerizing nose.

I thought that Force India were going to disappoint me again by not setting times in Q3, until Paul Di Resta exited the pits with 2 minutes remaining (ALthough this seemed to be just a formality to move him in front of his team-mate) I find it a massive cop out that Sutil didn’t go out as a lot of focus was put on the fact that this is a difficult circuit for fans to travel to… and so when I see a team deliberately sitting in the garage when they could be out giving the crowds a good show, I do feel slightly annoyed.

The big shock of the day was obviously Hamilton getting Pole Position. Absolutely fantastic to see McLaren achieve that, though I can’t help be the voice of pessimism and say that maybe that could have something to do with Vettel easing off since the Championship is in hand. That said, I really would like a McLaren 1-2 tomorrow (Though Button would be my choice to win!) so I may actually get up at the crack of dawn to watch it!

A short one today in anticipation of a fantastic race tomorrow. Till next time…

Monza hasn’t been a race I was eagerly anticipating this year. As Spa is my favourite race I was fully expecting to still be coming down from my Belgian high and unable to fully embrace the next race. As has happened time and time again this year though, I was thankfully grabbed by the eyeballs from the word go!

Apparently this year Monza wanted to prove itself by having the worlds deadliest grass at it’s disposal… with most major incidents happening after a driver touched rubber to grass and lost an aspect of control. The main incident was the first corner carnage of course, where Luizzi’s car was obviously feeling it hadn’t had enough media coverage this year and jazz-handed into view from stage left. I’m wondering how the stewards would have handled it if Luizzi had simply slotted in to the pack and kept driving Ken Block style… Stop-go penalty for managing to gain 10 places on the grid in one swoop?! I’d be inclined to reward him for managing to rally his F1 car into a points position!! Fantasy aside, the reality was one F1 car sliding sideways into the pack, immediately taking out Rosberg and Petrov and damaging the race of a few other drivers, Barrichello and Hamilton in those numbers.

I’m in two minds over first lap incidents like this. On the one hand it ruins the race of (more often than not) middle-of-the-pack drivers who are often trying to get a few points from the race. Rosberg and Petrov have both been on pretty good form this year and it must have been so disappointing for them. On the other hand, crashy crashy!!! This shakes the race up and can be the cause of some surprise faces in the points. For example the 2004 United States Grand Prix may have seen only 9 cars still racing at the end following a first lap pile-up, but it was a point for consistent underdogs Minardi and Takuma Sato stood on the podium to collect the third place trophy. I do love to see a break from the normal 3 teams being the top finishers, therefore I can cope when a few of my favourites have to sacrifice their race to accommodate.

Moving on, I must make reference to Vettel’s return to race-leader after a spectacular pass on Alonso. As my regular readers will have already realised, this is not a situation that made for comfortable viewing for me, mainly because I love Fernando and mega-loathe Vettel. I will admit it was a fabulous pass, HOWEVER that makes for perhaps two decent overtakes this year? I still maintain that Vettel isn’t the all-round racer some people assume he is just because he can lead from the front. Look at Button, Schumacher and Hamilton this year. They are all about the wheel to wheel racing and working their way up the pack, which makes for a much more exciting race. I hated Schumi when he did the same almost a decade ago, all leading, no surprises…. no fun!

The result was fairly standard of this year, with representation of each of the top three teams on the podium. Points for my faux-brother Di Resta were a plus, good lad! Bruno Senna also made it into the points which should not be taken lightly. I had wondered if Spa qualifying had been a fluke, however I’m starting to think that given the right car Bruno is beginning to live up to the hype that surrounded him when he first started hovering around F1. It’s exceptionally difficult to live up to a legendary family member. The Villeneuves, the Hills, the Rosbergs… that’s one thing. However to be the nephew of Ayrton Senna, perhaps one of the most highly thought of drivers of all time, puts the pressure on big time. I’m excited to see what he has in store for us for the rest of the season. Please don’t do a Rosberg and disappoint me Bruno!!!!

Till next time folks, I’ve got to go and age a year

Of course Schumacher wasn’t the only one to have a fantastic race. Jenson Button managed to straddle almost every position on the track before ending on the Podium. An error in timing and judgement caused his dismal qualifying session and handed him the ‘lucky for some’ position of 13th on the grid. I won’t repeat my exact words on seeing he was out in Quali 2, but it was along the lines of  “Goodness gracious Jenson, that is not quite the result we were looking for!”

With regret, I move on to the bulk of my piece, the controversies. Oh my, were there not a few corkers this weekend? Firstly the shock of Bruno Senna replacing Nick Heidfeld for Renault. The horror! The outrage! The…. oh wait he’s qualified in 7th. If anyone…. ANYONE has footage of Heidfeld at that exact moment, please let me know and send me a copy. There’s a German word for what I would experience…. Schadenfreude. If you’re not familiar with the language… it means ‘shameful joy’.

My second qualifying shocker was Alonso’s poor position. The red flag in Quali 2 left me balanced precariously upon my seat as I began to fret that he may not reach the top 10 shootout, but he did not let me down. On to the shootout he posted a fairly so-so time, then Massa went quicker, so did Rosberg… then so did Alguersuari?! AND SENNA?! As previously mentioned though, qualifying seems to mean less and less this year, and thankfully my Spanish boy managed to get himself to 4th by the race end. Phew!

And so we get to Lewis Hamilton. Upon being posed the question on twitter ‘how many reprimands has Hamilton had this year now?’ my answer, which can’t have been too far out, was “73 million billion and 1.” I generally find Hamilton to be a smug little git, however I did react in a rather maternal way in qualifying where he was, in my opinion, deliberately sideswiped by Maldonado… by exclaiming “That was on purpose!!!! He just did that ON PURPOSE!”

Whilst it can be argued that Hamilton pushed his nose out towards Pastors car… there was still no reason for him to be that close post-qualifying. Hamilton had a similar incident with Kobayashi during the race, but was the only true casualty and has since come out and apologised, taking full responsibility. You really have to respect a competitive driver who will throw his hands up and say ‘I messed up’, so for the first time ever I give kudos to Lewis. Maldonado on the other hand has come across as a precocious brat in interviews after the race. Little bit of advice Pastor… if money got you in your seat, keep your mouth shut and prove you are worthy of your seat on the track rather than insulting the real racers. (oh yes, I went there)

Oh, and some guy called Vettel won the race… but I’m out of words so let’s just leave it at that!!

Till next time petrolheads

Something finally happened in Qualifying worthy of sitting up in your seat, Vettel qualified 3rd behind his teammate and Lewis Hamilton. I’ve maintained through this season that if Vettel doesn’t start on the front row we see how good an all-round driver he truly is, which in my opinion he is not. Don’t get me wrong, he has the raw speed and he is fantastic off the line, but I genuinely don’t think he is a mid field battler. Until now that’s not been a problem however today we saw that he can really fall down under the pressure of having to work his way through the field. Seb secured some advantage through his final pit stop to leapfrog Massa, however he had basically followed Massa through the field until that point, overtaking right after the Brazilian and attacking drivers when they were already on the backfoot. Vettel NEEDS to lead from the start, it is just simply how he wins races. Compare him to a driver such as Alonso or Hamilton and it’s no contest. Much as I dislike Hamilton, it’s difficult to see him ever giving less than 100% and settling for a place lower down the field rather than fighting.

Something is beginning to concern me midfield, namely the fighting spirit of Kamui Kobayashi. Where has it gone?! Where is the spritely, slightly insane driving style we’ve come to adore? I would really hate to see him go off the boil, and today on a few occasions it really felt like he was rolling over for a tummy-rub like a pampered puppy. Kamui, wake up! We need you being a threat again and making sure the front runners stay on their toes. Today it was Rosberg who seemed to be terrifying other drivers, at long last!

And now for a slightly more sensitive subject… Race seats. I have been gently prodded by the admin of this very blog to share my opinions on who will be where next season. The way I see it there will be 2 seats open, those of Webber and Massa. Webber mainly because unless you’ve been living on Mars this year (and part of last year) you’ll have realised he’s not overly pleased with apparent favouritism at Red Bull and the fact that for a F1 driver he is cracking on a bit. Massa has not been the same man since his accident last year, and he just doesn’t seem to have it in him anymore. Couple this in with the fact that whilst McLaren like their British line-up, Button is not getting the results and Hamilton is just a walking PR disaster of late (though it is extremely obvious from his wooden, forced smiley-faced interviews from Silverstone and this weekend that he’s been beaten with the McLaren ‘silly-stick’ for opening his mouth without thinking) I can’t see McLaren wanting rid of Hamilton to be fair, he is a sublime racer, even if his maturity is severely questionable when he’s busy lobbing his toys out of his very expensive pram. Also he is very much a number 1 driver… he’s already proved he can’t be in a tea, with Alonso, and the chances of him being willing to play second fiddle to Vettel are just laughable. Whereas Jenson ‘wow it’s bracing’ Button doesn’t quite have the on-track aggression Mclaren are looking for. What do I want to happen? I would love to see Jenson go to Ferrari replacing Massa, Di Resta to replace Button in the McLaren and, controversially, Webber to stay put. (failing that I’d want to see what Rosberg could do in a better car) However, as always, that’s just my opinion and I am VERY sure the team bosses don’t need my help in deciding who will drive for them next year. I do think it’s going to be interesting… unless no one moves. Then I will pout.

To end on a happy note I have more on my affection for happy-go-lucky newcomer Daniel Ricciardo. Not only does he share my ‘I’m pretty sure my surname is pronounced differently in it’s origin language but I just say it like….’ approach to his name but he also happily announced that he wished they’d move Spa on the calendar so he would attend Reading Festival. Cute! Boy loves his music, how can you argue with that?

After my body somehow managed to pull a Mystic Meg on me and cause me to fall asleep during the first lap of Valencia, which proved to be a snoozefest to forget, I had decided this race I should probably be awake in order to form an opinion or two on it.

Silverstone is a race you cannot afford to miss for many reasons. Loyalty, Britishness, VT’s of Button and Hamilton frolicking….. actually sod it. There are three reasons to like Silverstone, 1) Rain 2) Rain and 3) More rain. This is the one time when our temperamental British weather is fine by me. I find myself sitting pressing my fingers together in a pyramid, evil-genius style (occasionally accompanied by a maniacal giggle) when it’s announced that the track is wet, so this weekend I’ve been at my giggly best.

The first two laps will not go down as some of my favourite moments. In fact everything seemed to be going well for my least favourite drivers and terribly for my favourite drivers. Vettel passing Webber with the greatest of ease encouraged a slew of expletives from myself (For the benefit of my mother, those were ‘oh goodness’ and ‘oh that rascal Vettel!’) and I resigned myself to yet another procession race with Vettel not having to do very much except stay ahead. Wrong again was I, though I’m forgiving myself considering the end result!

Fernando ‘The Eyebrow’ Alonso, what a driver. I know I’m biased, but even his most avid critics can’t deny he is a brilliant all-round racer. Vettel may have the pace this year, but how many times have his overtaking abilities truly been tested? The Ferrari is not the fastest car this year, however considering the lead Nando ended the race with, it goes to show you can never completely ignore the red car looming in your mirror.

Aside from having a non-Vettel winner, there were several incidents which shaped the race today. Things that made me raise my voice in angst were mainly pit stop related. Kobayashi’s unsafe pit exit left him trundling through the Force India rigging to the sound of me squealing. I do love Force India. After years of hurt they may have replaced Minardi in my heart as the beloved underdogs… and also the previously mentioned resemblance of Di Resta to a certain family member of mine. Vettels wheel incident left a massive grin on my face, for obvious reasons… because now if he wanted to win he’d actually have to race! Heaven forbid! Of course on the flipside there was what I shall forevermore call ‘The unfortunate tale of Jensons wheel’ in which upon leaving the pits his wheel threatened to make a break for it. Though he has remained remarkably humble about it and not kicked off… Are you taking notes Lewis?

Next I move to the magnificent maths of Christian Horner. Were you aware 18 + 15 does not produce the same as 15 + 18? Allegedly had the race ended with Webber in front this would have lost ‘the team’ what he referred to as ‘a lot of points’. I think the translation there is ‘My precious Sebby would have lost some points!’. Had Horner said ‘look, it’s for the championship’ fair enough. However creating some hypocritical excuse just magnified the situation. Or was I mistaken in thinking it was Christian Horner who said that Red Bull ‘don’t do team orders’. Red Bull used to be the people’s team. Now they are beginning to get a rep as bad as Ferrari’s, which is quite sad

However, after the race I was reminded that some of these guys have a sense of humour away from the racing, as proved by my quote of the day from new boy Ricciardo “The blue flags kept me occupied” – That a boy!

Now I’m off to have a celebratory victory lap around my living room. Roll on Germany!

I found a few points of note in the build-up, particularly regarding the once invincible Michael Schumacher and what can only be described as a mild hate campaign against him. I agree that he should retire again, heck after about 2 races I was sure his ‘comeback’ was a terrible terrible idea… however now it appears that BBC’s media team have decided to put some pressure on him. After having the sheer gall to suggest he wasn’t being outclassed by Rosberg (how dare a competitive F1 driver be subject to realism!) Eddie Jordan stood outside Schumi’s garage and seemed to suggest that ‘our Mike’ was just a wee bit deluded. Of course as the race ended it became clear that Schumi had given his critics the finger with a solid 6th place ahead of the supposedly ‘better’ Nico Rosberg. Don’t get me wrong, Nico had the pace… but Michael ended up with the points. Food for thought? Or perhaps just a fluke…

Jenson Button had a race that fluctuated as much as my desire to actually get my driving license… he started in 5th, slid down to 10th in the first lap and then fought his way back to finish on the podium in 3rd place. As those who have followed my blog from the beginning will know, I have gone from considering Button to be one of the worst drivers in F1 to falling madly in love with his laid back humour and cheeky facial hair. Today was a good day for him as I don’t think he would have been able to do much about the Hamilton/Vettel situation so he ended right where he should have. I have a great deal of faith that he will get back up to Championship level soon enough, perhaps not in time for a revival this season but with any luck his 2012 season will be fantastic. Good luck Sir!

I’m also disappointed that I am off the drink these days as I have discovered a new drinking game for the BBC viewers. I call it the ‘DC Gonnae counter’, which is as it sounds… on uttering the delightful Scots word ‘gonnae’, we must all down a shot. Today would have killed us all due to the fact he had a pre-race chat with Di Resta, which seemed to activate his ‘Scottishness-competitiveness’ chip. I say let it all out DC! Give us an ‘ach!’ or a ‘jings!’ every now and then and I will be one happy bunny.

I’m off to enjoy the glorious Red Button Forum courtesy of the BBC, however this race weekend may not be over yet as I’m told 4 cars are under investigation for speeding under yellow flags. Watch this space…

So far this season we’ve seen two Pole to Race dominations by the purveyor-of-smug Seb Vettel (Legitimate terminology, I swear) which has me wearing my worried face. A decade ago marked the year where Michael Schumacher won his 2nd of what would turn out to be a 5 year domination in F1. Whilst it was thrilling to see a driver continue to win race after race, it can’t be denied that one dominating driver can become stale and boring. Perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself with only two races completed however Pole to Race wins are dismaying. I find myself looking further down the pack to see if I can’t catch some quality racing and skillful overtaking manoeuvres. The genius of this sport is in the fight, whether it be on the track or in the Pit Lane and I for one would much prefer to have my heart in my mouth watching a tricky overtake than to sit staring at one car cruising to victory… what can I say, I’m all for competition. Vettel fans however are enjoying the wins and glory with those close to me rubbing it in my face at every opportunity (including the moderator of thelump.net, you’re on my list Andy!) I do welcome a bit of friendly rivalry and banter though, and the minute Vettel slips up you had better believe I’ll be stood on my couch doing a victory dance.

On to the fresh meat, and frankly I’ve had a bit of a change of heart with my favourite drivers for 2011. No, I won’t be ceasing my support of Fernando Alonso… he’s my F1 life partner and I am still charmed by his skill and above all, his massive furry eyebrows. I have my eye on a few others, and two in particular may have you falling off your seats in shock. I found myself warming to Jenson Button over the course of 2010, in particular when it became clear he would not be winning the Championship. My initial dislike of Jenson stemmed from his overconfidence in his early years in F1, where he seemed to be guilty more often than not of blaming the car and the crew for his own mistakes and poor races. My personal theory is that now he’s finally won a championship and then found himself the following year in a less competitive car, he is in a better position to be humble. Therefore he becomes one of my ‘ones to watch’ for 2011. Alongside Mr Button is another British driver and a newcomer who has endeared himself to me over the first two races of the season. Paul Di Resta is not a driver I would have pictured myself supporting, I generally tend not to support the Brit drivers as I find the media can build them up too much to properly appreciate the driving rather than the driver. Qualifying 8th on the grid in China in a Force India, the chap who reminds me a little bit of my brother when he was 12 has caused me to sit forward and take notice. He is one to watch for the future.

Tomorrow brings the third race of the season and I’m hoping for a non-Vettel win. Until then, enjoy your Saturday readers!